Thursday, September 3, 2009

The conversation in my head

Please be aware there will be profanity in this post. I finally got out for a ride after work on Wednesday. I changed it up a bit and headed up Wilson Mills east to try that climb. It was a tough one and I held 10mph to the top and was pretty happy about that. I had already been riding hard since Fairmont and Richmond so I kept hammering over County LIne to Sherman to Caves.

It gets steep to the stop sign and as I approached it I heard a car coming up and it had that sound like stupid was driving. After youve ridden long enough you get a sixth sense about stupid so I threw out my left hand to signal my turn. I heard the revs of his motor slow a bit and glanced back and took my spot in the middle of the road. Remember its steep and I have been hammering for close to 45 minutes so I am not going super fast. I DO roll the stop sign, but at what speed I have no idea.

THis is where I have to tell you I am cursed (I call it a curse) with empathy. I feel as if I can sense other peoples emotions (ok, everyone can, but do they bother?) and i usually act to bring about some equilibrium. I call it a curse because I spend so much time worrying about other people and usually not enough about myself. I wont go any further.

SO my sense of this guy is impatience so I accelerate hard and am on my happy way then I hear him yelling "hey why didnt you stop?" So I yelled back to him the truth. I said "So you could get going faster". Its my empathy thing again. But i guess I misjudged this guy so he yells back some crap and "NIce stop DICKHEAD" and roars off with a heavy dose of throttle.

Well that really pissed me off. My initial reaction was what a fucking asshole and after the last few weeks of crappy work, but tiny paychecks, stress about school and etc. I felt like I could explode. So the typical looking jerk. Black SUV, black polo shirt and white hair and of course overweight. I have so many problems with older drivers. The car color? Well thats pretty vague, but it comes into play again later.

So I have this imaginary dialogue between myself and the a-hole as I ride on towards Brigham to Chagrin River and up Old Mill east. First thing I thought of was that he didnt give a rats ass about me rolling the stop sign. He just hates cyclists on what he mistakenly thinks are his roads. A common mistake among drivers who dont ride (or exercise in many cases I bet). And what a hypocrite. I wanted to ask him if he yells at every car that rolls and runs stop signs? Then I wanted to ask him where he lives so I could follow him for a d ay and write up the 100's of violations he committed mile by mile like speeding, rolling stop signs or not stopping at all for right turns on red, running lights and the list goes on forever.

So after many conversations in my head where I try to be reasonable I finally decided on what I should have said in the first place. I should have yelled back "Shut the fuck-up you Hypocrite" and left it at that. I certainly would have felt a lot better. NOt that he would have gotten it. I have stared down too many elderly angry men who act like they have the cognitive skills of a 4 year old brat who is incapable of reasoning than an adult to expect any better.

So while approaching Mayfield on Chagrin RIver road another guy in a new black v8 sedan goes left of center on a dbl yellow line full throttle right at me to pass a guy driving too slow for him. We make eye contact, but does he back off at all? Not one flippin bit. Asshole number two. The statistics state that people who buy black cars are more aggressive and significantly more likely to get in an accident. Well you two fucking neanderthals can take your worthless opinions and lack common sense and crash for all I care. Just crash into a light pole or ditch and dont hurt me or anyone else.

I've about had enough of caring for the common man. The person Ive never met whom I waste my time trying to figure out how to please. But i suppose if I lowered my self to their level I wouldnt be me. I am just saying its getting old being disappointed by my fellow human beings all of the time. I call my empathy a curse, but I am sure its a blessing. I just dont see it today.


Kevin said...

The cyclist hater phenomenon is pretty strange. There have to be drivers just sitting in their car waiting to see a cyclist so they can yell some insult and drive away without giving the rider an opportunity to respond. It's either their hobby, or they are frustrated, angry people on a hair trigger all the time.

It really sucks that they can essentially give a cyclist a transfusion of their blood borne rage. It's like getting a dose of stress and anger hormones against your will.

Also, what's the deal with idyllic Chagrin River Road? Riding around there feels dangerous lately. It might be worse than riding in the redneck areas.

Anonymous said...

If you ever doubt this phenomenon, just look any online article about cyclist/driver issues and see what kinds of comments the idiots post.